With Regard to Father’s Day

UPDATE: I would like to take this opportunity to include my good friend and ex-husband Tracy Smith, Sr. in the number of those to whom honor is due with regard to Father’s Day. At the time of this original post, we were in the middle of an 18 month period where we had no contact whatsoever. My heart was still very injured and I did not have the wherewithal to speak about him objectively.

Today, we are amicably divorced and it has made room in our hearts to be more effective co-parents to our sons even as young adults. He has been more present for them (and me) than he had been in many, many years.

He has always done his best to support his sons, even when he did not understand their vision and because of his presence in their lives they understand work ethic and have a strong sense of honor for obligation. I honor you, Tracy for everything you have been to your sons and would not trade our friendship for anything. God bless you, old friend.

And, HAPPY FATHER’S DAY to every dad, uncle, mentor, pastor…and even to the moms who have had to fill the void in some form or fashion.

Kaleidoscope Perspectives

BUILD THE KINGDOMI have a pretty hard time with all the familial holidays. Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Grandparent’s Day…take your son/daughter to work day… big brother/sister day…hug your second cousin day. When you come from a family as ambiguously bound together as mine, the true importance of celebrating family members gets contorted and totally lost.

This holds particularly true for Father’s Day as I come from a matriarchal family where men were relegated to either coming home from work and sitting in a chair to watch TV with no intelligible conversation, or drinking themselves into a giddy stupor only to wake up angry at the world, or just coming around to be entertained only to disappear when the real work of being a dad was required. Entertaining a relationship with the fathers in my life proved to be a masochistic exercise in futility.

And (I suppose) that is where my perception of…

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